Friday, 20 February 2015
So yeah, I'm not very good at keeping up with this blog haha. But in all honestly I have been super busy between work, uni and assignments. I done some night shifts the other week which was fun.I love nights, I am such a night time person. I've applied for a few jobs, hoping to hear something from them soon. I've identified an area I would like to work in, but I still have the dream of being a storm chaser. What can I say, tornados are my all time fav hazard.
I have a residential field trip the week after next. Its going to be very strange not having the hazards girls with me on it. But my new friends are awesome. We are also slowly learning more and more about Sicily, which I am ridiculously excited about. I'm really looking forward to comparing it with Vesuvius.
I been thinking a lot lately about the past. And although its something I try not to dwell on sometimes its good to look back. In the past few years I have grown a lot, more than I realised. I think it all started really when I left Kent. I mean the easy option would have been to stay and finish my Forensics Degree (something I would one day like to complete) but I think Forensics is something you have to be ready for, to deal with the horrors day in day out, and I just wasn't. It also would have been easy for me to drop out altogether. But I didn't want that so I fought for what I wanted. I got the education I wanted and most important deserved. I learned to fight again. And that was something I definitely feel like I lost in College. Especially being made to feel like I wasn't smart enough to achieve my dreams. Being told time and time again that they don't think uni is for you, and that you would struggle, diminishes a persons self believe and I'm not gonna lie, I did get to the point where I was like 'what's the point, why even try if all i'm gonna do is fail'. Which I guess explains my A levels results....
I also been thinking a lot about my previous relationships. Not that I want to go back, I have come so far it would be ashame to go back now. But I think they main thing I realised was that we were both kids. We didn't know what we were doing really, the damage we were causing. I'm not sure how I impacted his life, if there was any impact at all, but I know he had a huge impact on mine. I think that we were both to blame for the situation we ended up in. I should have learned from my mistakes, and he should have learnt from his. But in all truth, we were so different, everything from music to our aspirations in life. It was bound to end this way on way or another. It doesn't mean that learning to trust someone new isn't hard. And baby steps is definitely something that needs to be taken, but for the first time in however many years I feel hopeful. Hopeful that I will get everything I want and deserve in life. Hopeful that I remain strong enough to tackle anything that comes my way.
Even with lost friendships, and there has been a few along the way, some we just lost touch and some there was cracks in the foundation. I think its always a shame to lose a friend, especially because each one of them have had a part in my life, no matter how big or small, our fingerprints will always remain on the people we touch. Theres always something so secure about someone you have known for years. You never need to explain your actions because they just get it.
I think reflection is good to do from time to time. It allows you to see how far you really have come. it allows you to learn from your mistakes. But it is also important to remain looking forward, to not live in the past. The past is good, but its a past for the reason. The future is exciting, who knows where I will be in 6 months! and thats the beauty of things, and the beauty of life is that no one knows. Its exciting and scary all rolled into one.
Anyhow I'm due to donate some blood soon so I should probably go and get ready :).
Until next time; (which hopefully wont be so long)
Aimless :) xx
"There comes a moment when its more than just a game, and you either take that step forward or turn around and walk away, I could quit, but heres the thing, I love playing the field"
Sunday, 7 December 2014
It's only going to be a quick blog as its 3:20 in the morning and I have to be up at 7:30 for uni 😔, which could be interesting...
Any how, not a lots been happening, I've just been writing up my assignment. Almost finished just some lit to add in and the methods and to work out exactly how pezometers can be used to find out ground water levels (anyone else know?!?) and it's done, but it has been the sum total of my life for the last few weeks...
Anyways I'm off to sleep as I can't miss my lecture again in the morning
Until next time;
"When life gives you lemons, drink tequila"
Friday, 28 November 2014
So Jess and Ashleigh surprised me with a visit last weekend. It was amazing J. I showed them around Pompey, took them to see the Hovercraft and we played mini golf. There was a lot of innuendos in mini golf one of my favourites being “I never normally have this problem with balls”, Lunch was good to; I’ve found the spoons here does really nice food which is handy to know if I ever need a cheap dinner out.
I also held a games night in the week, something which I’m hoping to do again. We played a game called Risk which was a bit complicated and to say I wasn’t very good at it was probably an understatement haha; needless to say Alex one. We then played cards against humanity which was also another game I’ve have never played but will one day purchase because it is absolutely BRILLANT.
Uni work is going okay, I’ve finally started writing the assignment but I defiantly need to get my head down and crack on; I’m hoping to have it finished by next Sunday so that I can go to the xmas do but we will see.
Only a short one today, but I’m absolutely shattered
Until Next Time;
“You’re completely free; you can do whatever you want. The world is your oyster, make lemonade”
Wednesday, 19 November 2014
So I have decided to record my life in the form of a blog as I transition from my undergraduate degree to my masters to whatever life hold for me in the future. I am not going to promise that this blog will be entertaining or of any interest to anyone other than myself; but I think this will be a proactive way to record my transition through life through the good and not so good times. I hope that one day I will be able to show this to my children (or nieces and nephews) when they reach this stage in life so they know that it is okay to not have a clue about what you want in life. Though this won’t be a blog strictly about my life; it will also be about things I interested in, it will also probably include some random entries because let’s face it life is a bit random.
So let’s begin; I should probably start with an overview of the past few months. Since having completed my undergraduate degree from Chester a few months ago my life has been non-stop. I’ve moved a lot, home from Chester, to a new home in my hometown, and to Portsmouth where my journey in this life continues. I have a lot of fond memories of Chester and still to this day would consider it home. When I returned a few weeks ago for graduation it really did feel like I was going home. Chester will always be a special place for me, one full of lots of memories and great friends who I all miss dearly. When I transferred degree from Kent to Chester I honestly never expected to feel like this one I left. I had always assumed, like with Canterbury, I would go and spend a couple of years and return home, only revisiting the area on special occasions. I never expected it to become home, but somewhere over the rollercoaster three years it did; and it is something I will never forget.
I also moved from the house I grew up in and spent the last 17/18 years in to a new house. I’m not going to lie; the new house in amazing. If for no other reason than I finally have a double bed at home, and a room where I can move, having previously had the box room which really was a box. I spent the majority of my summer working as usual, and then left for the next chapter in my academic studies here in Portsmouth.
The Msc is great; really hard though, the days I am in university are very tiring and hard on the brain. I have met some great people here and they have become good friends. I still find it strange having lectures by different lecturers and not having all my Chester friends surrounding me in them; but I am slowly getting used to it. It has now however, come to the time when I need to start figuring out what I want in life, and my next step. To be completely honest; I have got a clue. I mean I know I want to work with natural hazards but I have no idea which one, they all fascinate me, and I would be truly happy and content working with any one of them. I love the idea of doing a PhD but I honestly don’t think I have another two years plus of education left in me. I will do it one day, I am determined to; but I think I need to wait, work out what I want in life, and take it from there.
I do however have a pretty amazing idea for my thesis which I am hoping to get published; all I have left to do is work out how I will get the data I need, and how I am actually going to achieve what I want to do. But that is a problem for another day, like once I have finished in my assignment whose deadline is fast approaching (well in about three weeks; but still).
Like I said, this may be of no interest to anyone, but it’s my life. I spend most my days working, either in university or where I work; and my down time is spent watching DVDs and Greys Anatomy. My life generally is not very interesting or exciting most of the time; although it does have its moments.
Until next time;
"No matter how much you grow taller, grow older, we are still forever stumbling, forever wondering, forever young"